How to stop an Emotional Affair – 5 Key recipes
Do you think all affairs include sexual interaction? Think twice. In some cases people do not get active sexually, but they still sort of cheat on their partners with other people. It is something called “emotional affair”. How do you unmask and stop it? Learn now.
What is an emotional affair?
In most cases it takes place at work. People spend there 9+ hours a day and that is considerably much more than they spend with their spouses at home. People get connected and attached to each other. They share interests and feel affection. That is how the thing starts.
In many cases women tend to be more involved in such affairs than men. Surely, they feel sex drive and become attracted to the man, but since there is no action taken, they feel they are on the safe ground. Often time people involved in emotional affair share their private information and even discuss their spouses with each other.
They may or may not end up having sex. People get more intimate with their “emotional” partner then they do with their spouse (boyfriend or girlfriend). Still none of them ends up avoiding emotional pain. They either ruin their marriages and get divorced, or make the choice to break up with their emotional partner and boy that hurts.
Ways of ending an emotional affair
The truth is that ending the emotional affair could be much more difficult than ending up the one that involves sex. Sexual relations do create strong bonds between people, but emotional once are even stronger. Here are few steps you can take to end that up.
1 – First limit yourself and the relations
Most likely you have crossed the boundaries in your communication and confidentiality. You two got too close and now you are gaining undue emotional support and satisfaction from the wrong source.
The way out is to limit that communication. Yes, it hurts. How do you do it practically? First you limit all the undue interactions which are not directly related to your work. No chatting, no emailing back and forth and no sharing of fun stuff. You should also limit your live interactions and the time you spend with that person at work to the possible minimum. Stop having lunch or coffee breaks together. Get more communication with other people on your team and keep them purely professional. One thing to do is to end emotional infidelity texting. You may not have actual sex, but you may joke about it or talk about it. Just stop it.
2 – Boost your existing relationships
There is no way you can end the emotional affair unless you fill up the gap created by such a break up. So, start working more on your marriage or your existing relations. Boost your love life, have more fun at home, get closer to your partner. If that is impossible, you would hardly be able to end the affair or would start another one soon after.
3 – Be honest
Any affair involves two people. You cannot end it just on your side. You need to talk it over with the other person and explain why you wish to end it. They may hurt, too, but that would be an honest thing to do. This way they would not feel bad about themselves and would not be left guessing why you broke up the close bond with them.
And be honest with your partner. In many cases emotional affairs don’t just happen. There are valid reasons for them to take place. It well might be that many of your inner needs are not met by your spouse or partner. If that is the case, you should not be the only one to blame for it.
Only honesty could help you overcome the temptation and heal up your marriage. Talk to your husband or wife and tell them why such things happen. Let them know how they can help you to stay away from such affairs in the future. Tell them how much you wish to fix your relations and make things work. Unless that healing take place, you would most likely fall into such an affair again. You cannot possibly live for years with your inmost needs to be neglected.
Plan some activities and things to do with your partner to improve the existing relationships and fill up that void. It might be they have no idea you have such needs that go unmet by them.
4 – Change location
In some “severe” cases you may want to move away from your emotional affair partner. You might even have to quit the job. Being next to them could become a torment and the only way to end it is to get away. You may move to another office of your company or find another job, if you really value your relations and wish to end an affair.
5 – Become accountable
Find a friend who could help you get over it. It should be the same sex friend else you risk starting a new affair. Allow them to ask you some questions and promise to be honest with them. If you still communicate with the other person, let them read your letters and tell you how personal you get with it. In some cases your husband or your wife might be the person you open up to and become accountable to in such a situation.
As you can see, there is no easy way out of the situation with emotional affair. It could become a painful process, but if you believe your existing relations are worth it, go for it. Do not hesitate to ask for help and remember that honesty is the only and the best thing you can use to stay clean and happy, even if it hurts at first. Summon up your courage and find your way out of the situation.