Break up tips
10 easy ways to break up with your girlfriend
Break ups are hard. There is not really a painless way of handling them, even if both of you agree to stop being a couple, let alone when one is still in love. Still there are things you can do to make it more tolerable for your lady.
How to break up with your girlfriend – 10 Dos and Don’ts
Of course, there is no one for all solutions for dumping someone. All situations differ and most likely you would not be able to avoid hurting her feelings. However, these steps and tips would help you manage the task as well as you can.
- Personal meeting
Some guys feel like breaking up via phone or text message is a great idea, but it is not. If you really care for her feelings, you should talk to her. After all, you did not date her on the phone or via text messages, so respect her enough to give that last conversation.
Make things clear. Do not leave any uncertainties in the ended relationships. If you firmly decide to move on with your life, let her know there is no way back. Explain why you do what you do. Give her some reasons for the break up.
- Write her a letter
I.e. the real letter on paper. It is a bit old fashioned, but much better than dumping a girl via text message. Make it a long letter, too. Explain all the reasons, tell her something nice about her and how you appreciate you two being together in the past. Make it nice. Do all you can to make her feel better about the whole thing. Try to pick the right break up words.
- Give her farewell gift
Send her a letter with a goodbye gift. That would make the parting easier and nicer. Focus on all the good things you two had together and thank her for the gift she has been to you. Still, make it clear that the relationship is over and there is no going back. Basically, you need to close the door to the past, end that chapter in your and in her life.
- Disappear after the explanation
One of the worst things you could do is to offer her to be friends. This leaves the door open and she might be still hoping to get you back. Surely, break up is a hard thing to survive. However, if you do it nicely, there is no need for the “follow up” conversations and keeping in touch. Yes, it would hurt at first, but disappearing would help you and her to move on with life. If she has no hope of getting you back, she might meet someone nice and get into new relationships instead of waiting for you to come back.
- Be honest
Let’s say you met someone else. Do not try to blame it all on her and tell her she was not good enough for you. Be honest. Just say that your feelings have changed and it is you to blame for the break up in this case. Take up the responsibility and do not even try to share the blame. Help your ex to maintain high self-esteem and move on with her life.
- Make a break up as private, as you can
No comments on social media, no rapid change of status on your side. Do not make private matters public. Do not tell anything to your friends, at least before you talk to her. You do not want her to find things out from strangers instead of getting the news from you personally. That is a mean thing to do. So, be manly and nice, even if she has really been mean to you all the time. After all, you are the man.
- Prepare her
Do not make the break up sudden. It is like yesterday you told her you loved her, and now you are dumping her! If you consider breaking up, do not plan any romantic events with her. Show her your coolness. Let her get an idea that your relations are not going too well. A sudden and unexpected break up could be extremely painful.
- Let her share her opinion
Do not just tell your opinion and go. She has been the part of this relationship and she has the right to tell you what she thinks of it. That would help the lady to get over the break up. Yes, such a conversation may not be a pleasant one, but you owe her at least one such thing. So, prepare to spend some time talking to her and do not hope for the talk to last 15 minutes.
- Ask her if she is ready to break up
In some cases the lady might have been thinking about the same thing, but was unsure how to handle it. This way you can go through a nice and easy break up, because it is mutual. However, if she is radical about it and she is not ready for it, you may want to give her few weeks to handle the situation. Of course, if you already seeing someone else, that might not be the case. Otherwise, do not rush with it.
As you can see, breaking up could be even harder than finding a good date. So, you should consider the end from the beginning and be careful as who you are dating. Still, if that is the only solution to the situation you see, you should take your time and get prepared for the unpleasant talk. Map out the future conversation, plan for a good location for it (somewhere private and quiet).
Plan the steps you would take after the break up and set the rules for your further communications. In some cases, you should get prepared for handling stalking and attempts to get you back. These tips would help learn how to break up with fiancé and end the relations as nicely as you can.